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Greg and Beththe political and personal musings of two
mountaineers living in west-central Florida
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Recharging |
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Beth, 1/18/04 9:01:50 pm |
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Just like Greg, I have been pretty busy too. I'm loving my job. I feel like I have a real career now. All the other jobs I've had I felt like I was wasting time and wasting my life for the most part(aside from life changing stint as a camp councilor). I'm happy I enjoy my work and I love the people I work with.
But it still takes a lot out of you working 40 hours a week and staying on top of all of my responsibilities.
This weekend I recharged my batteries, as well as rebooted my internal computer. Got to do a lot of thinking and a lot of reading.
I'd been feeling out of wack lately. Not sure how I really viewed my self and my life. As soon as we were married the pieces started falling in place. But lately I've realized there is a lot more to life than, "Hey I'm married. I know who I am now." No way! I feel like I'm just begining to find that. Most people are independant and then get married. Me i was sooo dependant on people, and now that I'm married I feel like I can take care of myself. I feel like I am strong enough at this point to do anything.
Maybe it was all I have been through in my life. Maybe it's not until now that I have felt free enough of it to make more of my self. But I do feel free. As great as it does feel, it's still a little bit disconcerting. Not a "normal" winter for me. I'm happy and strong. Still I can't help but feeling a little concerned that something's going to go wrong with my mind and emotions.
I made a promise to myself to stay stong and I'm doing it. So I read. And read. And read. All weekend. Most people read to escape. For me it helps me to think. LOL I guess it's my fast brain. If I keep part of it busy, the other part can figure things out in a calm way. So after reading 2.5 novels in 2 days, I'm relaxed. my mind is free and I feel more like my self than I have in a few weeks. Maybe that's all I needed was to calm the brain and let the uncontious reboot. |
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